How to eat well when your partner doesn't want to (and end up convincing them to change)

sure this story rings a bell. It begins on a day when, when the casserole is opened, peace ends. Someone has been wise, has opted for a healthier lifestyle and tries to convince his partner that it is possible to eat a healthier, balanced and, at the same time, appetizing diet. He expresses his arguments with jubilation because he thinks it is clear that it is a decision that his partner will gladly join. But what you find is precisely the opposite. I should have foreseen it; not only will you test your relationship, you'll also challenge an unwritten social rule,

Closed menu or a la carte? That's how fights start.

The best way for change to work is to convince the couple at the beginning of the relationship. UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson is a good example of this. Shortly after starting her romance with Carrie Symonds, she had already lost weight and looked a much more careful image. Johnson said goodbye to the nighttime beapes, and has banished his breakfasts from the remnants of the previous dinner. Symonds has been right with a couple of reasons he's used to convince Johnson to increase his vegetable intake: more energy and concentration,

The secret of change may be an oxytocin thing. Research has revealed that the one released during the displays of affection weakens the brain's reward signals to food. Although the study was conducted with a very modest sample, of ten obese or overweight adults, scientists observed that those who received the hormone showed less appetite for hypercaloric foods than those who had only received placebo. The authors suggest that the effect of any weight loss diet could be enhanced as a couple causing situations that stimulate this hormone: kisses, hugs, caresses or flattery.

Unfortunately, it seems that the love is normal. According to a survey by research firm OnePoll for US weight management company Jenny Craig, couples gain an average of eight kilos during the first year of relationship. Their lives hang happily downhill until one of them realizes that he must get rid of the kilos that love has generated, either within a few months of starting the relationship or years after he has married. The romantic soundtrack usually becomes a protest speech. Is giving in and having everyone eat on a letter an admissible answer?

For the head of the Nutrition and Body Aesthetic Medicine service at Asisa Care, Concepción Vidales, "unless in some family member there is a pathology, such as intolerances, allergies, severe digestive disorders, diabetes or obesity, it's good that the whole family is taken to the same varied and balanced eating pattern." Physician and dietitian-nutritionist Ana Bellón has the same opinion: "In a house everyone should eat the same thing. If there is someone who doesn't like a certain food a lot, they'll get less amount, but they should never make different dishes." But beware, being too strict can be counterproductive,

A constructive and positive attitude on both sides must be encouraged, and sometimes that involves allowing several menus to coexist at the same table. Vidales believes that it may be appropriate to individualize the objectives and take into account the needs and conditions of each, their metabolism, genes or gut microbiota, and Bellón admits that, "in a way, the difference in attitudes, as long as there is respect, it would not have to assume distance and much less deterioration, It's about sharing with respect, even if we eat different foods." However, in the long term it is appropriate to increase the level of demand,

IF you want to convince, lose weight

"If we move in an obesogenic environment, the chances of being obese are much greater," explains physician and dietitian-nutritionist Ana Bellón. The pattern is especially relevant among children, according to a university of Southern California paper published in the journal Archives of Pediatrics & Adolescent Medicine. "Living within a social network with a high level of obesity increases the risk of raising the Body Mass Index (BMI). 25% for adults and 19% for children. The increase is caused by the imitation of behaviors that trigger the disease and by the normalization of the problem", explain its authors. There is also the opposite phenomenon. When a family moves to a community with a lower rate of obesity, the risk of obesity falls by 29% in adults and 23% for children.

"Let's then try to make sure that the contagious is not obesity, but good manners," Bellon says. In this case, it is easier to convince with the facts than with the words. According to Vidales, it can happen that at first the effort to try to keep the other is wasteful, but it is important not to stop doing things right, "Possibly," he says, "when the couple begins to notice a change in the person doing the right thing - whether it's weight loss, more energy or less snoring and colds - also value making a change in habits."

It is not worth insisting on arguments when you can do with the example, and other indirect messages. "If there is always fruit, vegetables and, in general, no fast food, in the end a habit is generated. However, the last word has oneself." The coach Beatriz Sanz advises to practice influencer positive. "We need to know when we are pushing the boundaries and change the excess advice for transparent and respectful communication. We are neither the father nor the mother of our partner and, although we want the best, we have to be aware that everyone decides what to do with their health and with their well-being," she says,